Category Archives: Beliefs

The Deeper Issues

Speak To Their Deeper Structure

There’s an interesting movie that came out a few years ago.

About a bunch of aliens that decided to come to Earth.

Only when they got here, communication was an issue.

(You might wonder why they didn’t think of that before they made the trip).

This is generally something that’s never really focused on in movies.

Even movies about history.

They have a couple of different cultures meet, and they can communicate perfectly.

Most of the time, they just have everybody speak English and hope nobody notices.

Of course, in movies, books and other stories this is acceptable.

But in real life, communication is essential.

If you’ve ever been anywhere where you don’t speak the language, it can be pretty terrifying.

Especially if you’re alone and lost.

If somebody comes up and starts speaking English, it’s a HUGE relief.

However, most people just assume since everybody’s speaking English (or whatever your native tongue is), that’s that.

But that’s just the beginning.

Sure, if you’re with your buddies and you have a long history, you don’t need to say much.

But when you’re meeting somebody new, a potential client or love interest, you need to do a lot more than just speak English.

Everybody has their own unique way of experiencing the world.

If you don’t take the time to learn about THEIR model of the world, you’re leaving a lot up to chance.

Luckily, underneath all of our individual model’s of the world, lies a structure that is consistent from person to person.

Which means once you understand this deeper structure, and more importantly how to make sure your message resonates with this deeper structure, nearly everything you say will be accepted.

And if you’re REALLY advanced, and take the time to learn THEIR model of the world, then you can become even more effective.

More effective than 99% of communicators out there who spit out jumbled up collections of words and hope for the best.

Most people have conversations with strangers and then scarcely remember them.

But when you speak to their deeper structure, they will NEVER forget you.

Learn How:

Seven Laws

Bang My Head

How To Leverage Their Ego

In business you’ve got to make some tough choices.

A common metaphor is that you get something done inexpensively, quickly and high quality.

The rub is that you can ONLY pick two.

Meaning if it’s fast and cheap it’s not going to be high quality.

If it’s high quality and cheap it’s going to take a long time.

From inside our heads, we often have to make the same choices.

One thing we humans LOVE to do is be “right.”

That’s even a common expression.

“I know, right?”

But when it comes to persuasion, the need to be right can get in our way.

In fact, the less we need to be right, the more we can get done.

Plenty of famous people have been attributed with this quote:

“Humans can accomplish anything so long as it doesn’t matter who gets the credit.”

We KNOW this, but at the same time it’s our Achilles heel.

It’s REALLY DIFFICULT to see somebody else take credit for your idea.

People spend kajillion dollars on lawsuits for this very reason.

But if you CAN turn off your need to “be right,” just for a minute, you can get other people to do pretty much anything.

As an extreme example, if somebody REALLY WANTS to give you a sack of money, is it REALLY that important that they think it was THEIR idea?

If can manage to shut of our own “need to be right” just for a couple seconds, we can leverage the OTHER PERSON’s “need to be right” in our favor.

How?

Most everything we do is influenced by one of the seven laws.

Authority, social proof, scarcity, etc.

At the same time, while we are obediently following those seven laws, (following the crowd, doing or thinking whatever the authority on TV or Facebook tells us), we actually believe it’s OUR idea.

Nobody will explain their behaviors and beliefs as being put in their minds by social proof and authority.

Nobody will say, “I really don’t have any idea why I’m doing what I’m doing, but that guy has on a lab coat, and everybody is doing it, and that’s good enough for me!”

BECAUSE we have this “need to be right” we NEED to believe it’s OUR idea.

Which means if you can shut off your “need to be right” for just a little bit, you can leverage those seven laws like CRAZY.

Because when you combine them with conversational hypnosis, you don’t need anything but your words and the ideas they create.

And then just stand back and watch them “be right,” only they are “being right” in exactly the way you wanted them to.

Learn How:

Seven Laws

Risk Reward Of Persuasion

How She Got Money From Her Parents

When I was a kid I loved reading Mad Magazine.

Once they got into trouble because they had a very realistic looking $3 bill.

And supposedly, some kids were using them in change machines.

There was one bit I remember reading as a kid.

It’s pretty popular, I’ve heard it in a lot of places.

It was a letter written from a student at college to her parents.

She went on for a few paragraphs about how her life had completely changed.

She’d dropped out of college.

Gotten a bunch of tattoos and piercings.

(This was back in the day when that was still pretty “out there.”)

She was living with her new boyfriend who had just gotten out of prison.

She was also pregnant.

And she was pretty sure it was his.

But then the letter ended with the following:

“Just kidding. School is fine, my GPA is still 4.0, but I need a couple hundred dollars. Could you send it?”

The idea being that the parents would be so relieved that their little angle wasn’t tatted up and pregnant by an ex-con, that they’d gladly send her the cash.

Whereas, if she started out saying, “Dear dad, can I have some money?” she wouldn’t have gotten the same result.

This clearly shows that when we frame our suggestion or recommendation, we can have a much better chance of getting it accepted.

Instead of just blurting out what we want, if we think a bit, and put it in the proper context, it will be much more likely to be accepted.

What context?

Think in terms of cost and benefits.

Everything we do has costs and benefits.

Everything we think about doing has costs and benefits.

So when we present our ideas to others, they are going to IMMEDIATELY and usually unconsciously think of our ideas terms of costs and benefits.

The idea is to make your suggestion have a much better cost-benefit ratio (many benefits per cost) compared to the alternative.

Just choose something similar to your suggestion, but make sure it is MUCH costlier (in terms of time, money, or inconvenience) and only has a little bit more benefits.

Compared to THAT, your choice will be the most logical.

Luckily, there are plenty of ways to do this.

And the more you practice, the better you’ll get.

And this law, (Comparison and Contrast) is only ONE of the seven.

Learn Them ALL:

Seven Laws

Radiate Real Authority

How To Imply Massive Authority

One of the most groundbreaking studies in psychology is the famous Milgram experiment.

It’s been repeated several times, all with the same results.

There was a guy in a white lab coat, posing as a researcher.

There was a guy behind a class window, posing as a test subject.

Then there was the guy or gal who was supposed to give electric shocks to the guy behind the glass.

The supposed study, as told to the poor dude giving the shocks, was that it was some kind of new memory technique.

For every wrong answer, the guy behind the glass got a shock.

But the REAL study was to see HOW HIGH of a shock a person would deliver.

The shocks were actually fake.

And the guy screaming in pain was only pretending.

The results were horrifying.

Most people gave enough shocks to kill somebody, had they been real.

The guy behind the glass even pretended to have a heart attack.

But the test subjects kept shocking away.

All because lab-coat guy said it was OK.

The study was cooked up soon after WWII ended.

Everybody was curious how a country like Germany could go crazy and let a bunch of Nazis kill millions of people.

Turns out that we humans have a bunch of switches in our brains.

And if you know to flip those switches, you can get people to do ANYTHING.

In that particular study, they were leveraging the AUTHORITY switch.

Most people turn off their brains when a scientist in a lab coat tells them it’s OK to shock somebody.

Of course, these switches are neutral.

They are neither bad nor good.

They are like the proverbial driver who can either drive a getaway car or an ambulance.

If you use these switches for good, you can get people to do things that benefit EVERYBODY.

How many of these switches are there?

Seven.

Advertisers have been using them for a long time.

To get us to buy all kinds of stuff.

Many dating techniques are based on them.

But one thing most people DON’T know is how to COMBINE them with the Milton Model.

The patterns of conversational hypnosis.

It cost a lot of money to set up that experiment.

It’s kind of like a con in the movies.

You need a lot of actors (a guy playing a scientist, a guy playing the dude getting shocked, etc.) and you need to create the situation.

But with the Milton Model, you can hypnotically imply ALL of these switches.

Which means just by having a conversation, you can conjure up all kinds of authority.

Or any of the other seven laws.

Learn How:

Seven Laws

Conquer The Wasteland Of Their Mind

Ditch The Purple Neon Jacket

Little kids are perfect learners.

So perfect in fact that they learn EVERYTHING.

Not just the good stuff.

If you’ve got kids, you know how hard it is to keep them from learning the stuff you DON’T want them to learn.

Stuff that you or your friends (or maybe their older sisters or brothers) do in “secret.”

“I don’t want him to pick up any bad habits” is a common worry among parents.

Being a kid is different than being an adult.

If you are a kid, you can pretty much try ANYTHING, without getting into too much trouble.

Personally, I carried that idea as far as I could.

When I was in high school, my “go to” line when I got into trouble was:

“I thought it was OK?”

But as we move into adulthood, we need to CHOOSE our actions with more foresight.

At least that’s the theory.

We can’t just act and hope for the best.

The sad thing is because we’ve all gone through the mind numbing educational system, we’ve forgotten how we learn naturally.

Which is to model.

Copy the behaviors we want to learn.

However, we DO do this without realizing it.

We STILL pick up behaviors from others, without really knowing.

And every time you learn something from a YouTube instructional video, you’re essentially modeling the person on YouTube.

(At least if you’re following along and not just watching.)

But most people VASTLY underutilize this natural learning skill.

Especially in social situations.

A simple way to model somebody in social situations is to find somebody that does something YOU want to be able to do.

And as you watch them, mentally imagine it’s YOU doing that thing.

You can also model historical figures.

That’s the cool thing about modeling.

Since we’re doing it thoughtfully, as adults, and not mindlessly and automatically, like kids, we can pick and choose the traits we want to copy.

Kind of like if you’d model somebody who has really POWERFUL social skills, but really HORRIBLE taste in clothing.

If he’s wearing a purple jacket with a flashing neon sign on the back, you DON’T have to copy that part.

Only the part you want.

And when it comes to copying certain social behaviors, there is a class of people that are FAR ABOVE everybody else.

If you can do what THEY DO, and apply it to “regular” life, you can CLEAN UP.

Learn More:

Cult Leader

Dig Below The Surface

Social Circle of Lovers

They say you can’t make a second first impression.

This is sort of true, but like a lot of these “truisms” there’s a lot more than a clever saying.

The idea is based on a couple of other very general ideas.

One is that most of our communication is unconscious.

Body language, voice tonality, facial expressions.

It’s pretty easy to scan a room and find out who’s confident and relaxed, and who is nervous and closed off.

The second is that people form an opinion within a few seconds.

The idea then, is because that opinion is formed early, AND it’s done based on unconscious communication, then the image we project will be pretty consistent.

Our unconscious communication is the sum total of our beliefs, ideas about ourselves and the world, etc.

And because our beliefs don’t usually change by very much, then our unconscious communication, the energy we are always projecting, won’t change much.

But one thing that CAN change is HOW we use our verbal communication.

Most people use an “outside-in” type of communication.

Whenever we talk to others, we try and take OUR ideas out of OUR heads, and then put them into THEIR heads.

This comes across as us telling stories or anecdotes.

But it’s especially true when we have an idea of how we want the other person to respond.

Which is almost ALWAYS the case.

Even if the conversation is initiated by somebody else, everything we say comes with a desired outcome.

Sometimes that outcome might be to answer their question as easily and politely as possible, so they will leave us alone.

But when we do the approaching, or the initiating, we usually have a very clear idea of what we want to happen as a result.

And so long as we use the “outside-in” communication style, that “you can’t make a second first impression” usually holds true.

But it won’t be true if you flip the switch.

And instead of using an “outside-in” style (trying to put your ideas into their mind) you use an “inside-out” style.

This is where you ask them simple questions, and get them talking about things they like.

Most people aren’t expecting that.

Most people are expecting an “outside-in” style.

And that comes with a lot of assumptions.

But because speaking to them in an “inside-out” style is way different than they expect, they’ll soon learn that their impression was VERY incorrect.

Simply because people LOVE to talk about the things they like.

But when you take it even further, and continue talking to them that gets them feeling REALLY good, then you will do something pretty cool.

You will leave SUCH an amazing impression on them, they’ll NEVER be able to forget you.

So if you don’t even have any intentions other than making them feel really good, you will slowly be filling your social circle (or business contacts) with people who think you are AWESOME.

Learn How:

Secret Agent Persuasion

DNA of Success

Cut Through Their Social Anxiety

Most people have a certain amount of social anxiety.

Meaning that few people feel entirely comfortable around others.

If you define “total comfort” as how you feel when you are alone, and can say and do anything without worrying, then EVERYBODY has a form of “social anxiety.”

Everybody has things they feel comfortable saying and doing when they are alone, that they would NEVER do around others.

For example, have you ever been “caught” signing in the car?

You’re favorite tune is on, your belting it out along with the band, but then you glance around and somebody right next to you is watching you.

Few people would continue EXACTLY as they were before they were “caught.”

Even if you smile to yourself and change your volume, even slightly, you are responding because of social anxiety.

Sure, it may be perfectly acceptable social anxiety, but the structure is the same.

It’s also that same that keeps us from fully expressing ourselves the way we want.

Any time you have an idea in your head, and you imagine expressing it a certain way, but it comes out “differently” the inhibiting factor is social anxiety.

Social = You are around other people

Anxiety = An uncomfortable feeling of worry

Just that when people say, “I have social anxiety,” we assume they mean debilitating levels.

Like they can’t even go outside, or they vomit when they think of talking to attractive people.

But the truth is that EVERYBODY has anxiety of SOME level, whenever thinking about behaving socially.

It’s human nature.

Which is a good place to start from when intending to persuade anybody.

Why?

Because in order to persuade somebody, you have to put things in terms that they can understand.

(Unless you are using the, “do it my way or else” strategy).

Which means they have to be COMFORTALBE sharing with you something about what they want.

But most people, when you ask them, “What do you want?” aren’t going to feel comfortable telling you.

Even people who have been in intimate relationships have trouble telling each other what they want.

Luckily, there is a very EASY way to get them thinking about what they want.

A simple question process, which when used correctly, doesn’t even require that they speak.

Which means you can get deep inside their mind, and find their most treasured desires.

And since they’ll feel comfortable thinking and talking about those deepest desires with YOU, they’ll start to subconsciously associate those two things.

Their deepest desires and you.

Learn How:

Secret Agent Persuasion

Get Your Game Tight

Haphazard Seduction Patterns

Most people think that men and women are attracted to different things because men are visual but women are not.

This is only partially true.

It IS true that men and women are attracted to different things, but the “visual” part is not the whole story.

Men are attracted VERY QUICKLY. And that which makes us attracted is available to use visually.

Women, on the other hand, become attracted more slowly. And that which makes them attracted comes in through MORE sensory organs (sight, sound, hearing).

But that doesn’t mean they are less visual.

For example, she can tell VISUALLY from across the room whether you are confident or not.

How you move, your posture, etc.

But that’s not ENOUGH to make her physically and sexually attracted to you.

She needs to feel a lot of emotions in the right order.

Most guys try to create these emotions haphazardly.

They go the old school way, flowers, nice dates, etc.

Or they try “game.” Push pull, cocky funny, etc.

These CAN work, but they can also backfire.

It would be like trying to bake a cake blindfolded, only knowing that there is some mixing and cooking in there somewhere.

Most people don’t know WHY cocky and funny works, or WHY push-pull works.

Luckily, there is a much more efficient way.

One where you can create the right emotions in the right order.

This would be like baking a cake without the blindfold, with a step by step recipe.

Once you got the right recipe down, you can bake as many cakes as you want.

Over and over and over and over and over.

Learn How:

Hypnotic Seduction

Healing Energy

What Is The Meaning Of You?

What does “meaning” mean?

It’s a squishy concept.

It’s worse because some meanings are “easier” to accept than others.

Just like some food is “easier” to eat than others.

For example, if you’re hungry, there’s a couple things to consider.

One is how “easily” you can get the food.

Another is how “good” it will taste.

A third is how “healthy” the food is.

But since the “healthy-ness” of the food is not dependent on ONE single meal, it’s easy to dismiss.

So let’s say that in our hypothetical example, “healthy-ness” is a concern, but not a very big one.

So we’ve got two choices.

A big juicy cheeseburger (or your favorite fast food) which can be in your hands in less then five minutes.

OR you could go the grocery store, buy the ingredients, and cook something that’s as tasty, and a little bit healthier.

The cheeseburger is the EASIER choice.

But it’s also pretty clear that there is a better choice, that is also MORE DIFFICULT.

It’s the same with meaning.

The meaning we give to events when there is no way to really KNOW what the meaning is.

You smile at somebody and they don’t smile back.

What does that “mean?”

The EASY meaning is that they aren’t interested or attracted to you.

It doesn’t require a lot of brainpower. (Like eating the cheeseburger doesn’t require a lot of cooking power).

But could there be a BETTER meaning?

Unless you are going to go ask them, (and prove yourself right or wrong) why not?

If eating certain foods can (even though it’s a bit more difficult) keep us healthier, and even ALIVE longer, what about thinking specific thoughts?

Choosing specific, or at least, more helpful meanings.

Certainly, it’s not easy, it’s not automatic, and it takes effort.

Just like choosing healthy food to put in our body isn’t easy, isn’t automatic, and takes effort.

But the benefits are enormous.

Health, long life, more happiness, better sleep, better (more) sex.

What is the MOST IMPORTANT meaning you can choose for your ENTIRE LIFE?

The meaning you apply to yourself.

This is the “meaning” you project to the world, all the time.

The meaning YOU give to yourself will impact every decision, every relationship, and ever act you make.

Sadly, most of us have meanings that were GIVEN to them by others.

And we just accepted them.

But we don’t need to.

We can shrug them off, and choose different meanings.

It’s not easy, it’s not automatic, and it takes effort.

But it very well could be the MOST IMPORTANT decision you ever make.

Learn How:

Stop Manipulation

Magic Fantasy Land

How To Leverage Ancient Human Desire

Once upon a time, humans had very little.

It was us and all the other animals.

Eventually, some clever caveman figured out how to sharpen a rock.

Another caveman figured out how sling that rock through the air.

And through this “action at a distance,” they could hunt much more effectively.

The next greatest discovery was the idea of growing stuff to eat, rather than chasing stuff.

Unless you’re stuck in a horror movie, plants don’t tend to fight back when you try to eat them.

AND if you plant them the right way, they’ll keep giving you food every year.

The next greatest invention?

There were a lot of small ones, but the one that REALLY made society explode was the idea of “potential stuff.”

Up until this “potential stuff” was discovered, people had to trade what they had for what they wanted.

For example, if you wanted a burrito, and all you had was a sack of horseshoes, you’d have to find somebody that both WANTED a sack of horseshoes AND had a burrito, preferably one that wasn’t too old and moldy.

Since trading a sack of horseshoes for a burrito was pretty difficult, they needed a “placeholder” for the horseshoes.

Something the guy could trade the horseshoes for, and keep, and then give those same things to the guy who had the burrito.

What was this invention?

This “potential stuff?”

This “placeholder?”

Money, of course!

Once people could trade their stuff for money and keep money, they could live a lot more relaxed.

This same process exists today, even though the chain of money from us to the makers of whatever we are buying is extremely tedious.

AND that nearly everything we buy is made from TONS of people. Just think of all the people involved in the production of the device you are now reading this on.

The engineers, the designers, the advertisers and marketers, all the scientists from hundreds of years ago that discovered the principles upon which this device is based.

Even the first dudes who invented written language are involved.

Every single “trade” from the dawn of time to the time you bought this device and everything you’ll buy today, involve the same process.

We want what we DON’T have MORE than what we are giving in exchange.

Every single time somebody trades something, whether it’s a few hundred dollars for a wired device, to kids trading baseball cards, the process is the same.

And the GREAT NEWS is that what they WANT is based on THEIR own subjective values.

Why is this great news?

Because subjective values are EASY to INCREASE.

And if you can INCREASE DESIRE for whatever you have, (or even for you) you will also increase the chances of them taking whatever action you want them to take, to satisfy that desire.

How, exactly, do you do that?

With These:
Hypnotic Sales