No matter who you are, you have to learn skills as you go through life.
That’s one of the many differences between humans and all the other life forms on this planet.
Humans come with tons of instincts.
But we also come with tons of learning capability.
Even way back in the day when we were hunter-gathers, we had to continuously learn.
Since we were nomads, nothing was ever the same.
Different environment, different source of food, different climate, different things to be worried about.
Now, with our massively complex society, continuous learning and updating your skills is pretty much a given.
Like the Red Queen in “Alice in Wonderland,” you have to keep running just to stay in place.
When it comes to learning, there are two kinds of skills.
Skills that start off in the “unconscious incompetence” area, or the skills that start off in the “unconscious competence” area.
Most people only ever consider the first collection of skills.
The ones we don’t know we suck at, or unconscious incompetence.
Some new technology is invented, so we need to learn it.
Before it was invented, nobody knew anything about it, so we didn’t know that we didn’t know.
Then we know that we don’t know (conscious incompetence), and then we know that we sort of know (conscious competence).
A few people take it to the level of unconscious competence.
Meaning they are skilled, and do so without thinking.
For most of us, this comes in doing simple things like riding bikes or tying our shoes.
But there is a whole other realm of learning.
Of taking something we are born knowing how to do.
These are the things that start off as unconscious competence.
Walking, talking, interacting with people.
These are the things we tend to think we’re either “good” at or “not good” at.
And if we see somebody who is “good” at one of these skills, we shrug our shoulders as if there’s nothing we can do.
This, however, is false.
You can take any instinctive skill (unconscious competence) and raise it to the conscious competence level.
Back in the old days, girls would do this.
They would go to “charm school” to learn how to take their unconscious behavior (walking, talking etc.) and refine it.
Of course, in today’s society we’re told to just “be yourself.”
Which is perfectly fine.
If you are happy with what you are getting as your “authentic self,” that’s fantastic.
But your “authentic self” can be refined any way you like.
A particularly effective way is how you use your language.
Most people have half baked thoughts they try to describe with haphazardly chosen words.
But you can learn to use your language with extreme precision.
And deadly force.