Most people get nervous, at least a little bit, when talking in public.
Of course, there are many different spectrums with different endpoints.
In a one on one situation, there’s people we talk to that we like and hope like us.
Those situations can be tough to be relaxed and conversationally “entertaining.”
Whenever we’re around people we like and admire, there is always the fear of rejection.
One way that fear manifests itself by worrying that we’ll run out of stuff to say.
Or we’ll run out of stuff the other person finds “interesting.”
If you’re in a group, and you’re hanging out with friends, and there are a couple of new people in the group, this can also happen.
You suddenly find yourself in the center of the “conversational spotlight.”
It’s almost worse than giving a speech.
At least if you’re giving a speech, they more or less have to listen.
But if you find yourself talking in a group, there’s the ever present danger of getting interrupted by somebody.
And if that somebody has a MORE interesting story than yours, it can feel pretty crappy.
Especially if you were hoping to “impress” one of those new people in your group.
Luckily, there’s a VERY EASY way to take even the shortest, plainest story and tell in a way they will HAVE to pay attention.
Our brains don’t like unfinished business.
That’s why whenever something bad happens, we NEED closure.
Otherwise, there’s a painful “open loop.”
Having a bunch of painful open loops sucks.
But you can do the opposite.
Purposely leave open loops, but not the painful kind.
The cliffhanger kind, that they put near the end of your favorite TV show.
You can do this on a sentence level, a story level and a conversation level.
The better you are at creating these open loops, the more they will be DESPERTATE to pay attention.
Putting out a bunch of open loops in a regular conversation is like showing up to a kid’s birthday party with a bunch of cake and ice cream.
They won’t be able to resist.