Tag Archives: Confidence

Resonate With Her

Easy Secrets of Group Resonance

Resonance is a cool concept.

It’s also one of those words that sounds metaphysical, so a lot of people use it without really understanding it.

From a purely scientific standpoint, it refers to the natural frequency of any system.

Like a little kid on a swing.

When he swings his legs at the same “resonance frequency” as the swing, he can swing pretty high.

Singers that can break glass don’t have super powerful voices.

It’s that they can hold the perfect tone, without wavering.

And if that tone is the same vibrational frequency as the glass, then the glass will break.

Same deal when you rub your fingers around the rim of a wine goblet.

When the goblet starts to hum, it’s because the small vibrations of your finger along the top are the same frequency as the wine goblet.

Often times people talk about resonance among people.

Since there are WAY too many variables to even consider, this MUST only be a metaphor.

The resonance you share with your friends when you are all “vibing” is SORT OF like the resonance on a swing set.

But it’s only an approximation.

Thing is though, we understand that as a scientific concept, resonance can be repeated.

Wine glasses, swings, you can “resonate” with them any time you want.

But when we think of “resonating” with people, we assume it’s just one of those rare things.

It either happens or it doesn’t.

But us people, despite our goofy psychological makeup, are still made up of stuff, and although incredibly complicated, that stuff MUST follow the same laws of science that wine goblets and swings have to follow.

Which means if you understand the basic structure of human nature, and human thought, you can RESONATE with a great number of people.

Funny thing is when you are resonating with ONE person, it can be pretty difficult.

But resonating with a BUNCH of people is a lot easier.

See, we humans are PACK ANIMALS.

We naturally feel at home in a group of like minded people.

Which means in a lot of cases, it’s much easier to resonate with a GROUP of people than it is with any individual.

Learn How:

Cult Leader

Conquer The Wasteland Of Their Mind

Ditch The Purple Neon Jacket

Little kids are perfect learners.

So perfect in fact that they learn EVERYTHING.

Not just the good stuff.

If you’ve got kids, you know how hard it is to keep them from learning the stuff you DON’T want them to learn.

Stuff that you or your friends (or maybe their older sisters or brothers) do in “secret.”

“I don’t want him to pick up any bad habits” is a common worry among parents.

Being a kid is different than being an adult.

If you are a kid, you can pretty much try ANYTHING, without getting into too much trouble.

Personally, I carried that idea as far as I could.

When I was in high school, my “go to” line when I got into trouble was:

“I thought it was OK?”

But as we move into adulthood, we need to CHOOSE our actions with more foresight.

At least that’s the theory.

We can’t just act and hope for the best.

The sad thing is because we’ve all gone through the mind numbing educational system, we’ve forgotten how we learn naturally.

Which is to model.

Copy the behaviors we want to learn.

However, we DO do this without realizing it.

We STILL pick up behaviors from others, without really knowing.

And every time you learn something from a YouTube instructional video, you’re essentially modeling the person on YouTube.

(At least if you’re following along and not just watching.)

But most people VASTLY underutilize this natural learning skill.

Especially in social situations.

A simple way to model somebody in social situations is to find somebody that does something YOU want to be able to do.

And as you watch them, mentally imagine it’s YOU doing that thing.

You can also model historical figures.

That’s the cool thing about modeling.

Since we’re doing it thoughtfully, as adults, and not mindlessly and automatically, like kids, we can pick and choose the traits we want to copy.

Kind of like if you’d model somebody who has really POWERFUL social skills, but really HORRIBLE taste in clothing.

If he’s wearing a purple jacket with a flashing neon sign on the back, you DON’T have to copy that part.

Only the part you want.

And when it comes to copying certain social behaviors, there is a class of people that are FAR ABOVE everybody else.

If you can do what THEY DO, and apply it to “regular” life, you can CLEAN UP.

Learn More:

Cult Leader

Dig Below The Surface

Social Circle of Lovers

They say you can’t make a second first impression.

This is sort of true, but like a lot of these “truisms” there’s a lot more than a clever saying.

The idea is based on a couple of other very general ideas.

One is that most of our communication is unconscious.

Body language, voice tonality, facial expressions.

It’s pretty easy to scan a room and find out who’s confident and relaxed, and who is nervous and closed off.

The second is that people form an opinion within a few seconds.

The idea then, is because that opinion is formed early, AND it’s done based on unconscious communication, then the image we project will be pretty consistent.

Our unconscious communication is the sum total of our beliefs, ideas about ourselves and the world, etc.

And because our beliefs don’t usually change by very much, then our unconscious communication, the energy we are always projecting, won’t change much.

But one thing that CAN change is HOW we use our verbal communication.

Most people use an “outside-in” type of communication.

Whenever we talk to others, we try and take OUR ideas out of OUR heads, and then put them into THEIR heads.

This comes across as us telling stories or anecdotes.

But it’s especially true when we have an idea of how we want the other person to respond.

Which is almost ALWAYS the case.

Even if the conversation is initiated by somebody else, everything we say comes with a desired outcome.

Sometimes that outcome might be to answer their question as easily and politely as possible, so they will leave us alone.

But when we do the approaching, or the initiating, we usually have a very clear idea of what we want to happen as a result.

And so long as we use the “outside-in” communication style, that “you can’t make a second first impression” usually holds true.

But it won’t be true if you flip the switch.

And instead of using an “outside-in” style (trying to put your ideas into their mind) you use an “inside-out” style.

This is where you ask them simple questions, and get them talking about things they like.

Most people aren’t expecting that.

Most people are expecting an “outside-in” style.

And that comes with a lot of assumptions.

But because speaking to them in an “inside-out” style is way different than they expect, they’ll soon learn that their impression was VERY incorrect.

Simply because people LOVE to talk about the things they like.

But when you take it even further, and continue talking to them that gets them feeling REALLY good, then you will do something pretty cool.

You will leave SUCH an amazing impression on them, they’ll NEVER be able to forget you.

So if you don’t even have any intentions other than making them feel really good, you will slowly be filling your social circle (or business contacts) with people who think you are AWESOME.

Learn How:

Secret Agent Persuasion

Find Magic Everywhere

Build Relationships From Scratch

We are instinctively programmed to recognize a good leader.

And we are similarly turned off by false “eaders.”

A leader, of course, is somebody who LEADS.

Somebody who goes first.

Somebody we WANT to follow.

On the other hand, false leaders have figured out a way to FORCE us to follow them.

Throughout human history, there has been a mix of both.

This comes across conversationally as well.

Some people make us feel comfortable, open, safe.

Others either force us on the spot, or force us to listen to them blather on and on.

If you can make people feel comfortable, relaxed and open, they’ll tell you anything.

What they want, how they want it, and what they want to do with it.

This, of course, gives you a lot of leverage.

If you can creatively figure out a way to show them they can get what they want by helping you get what you want, you can create some pretty good relationships.

And if there’s one skill that will help in nearly every area of life, it’s the ability to create relationships.

Most people kind of drift around, HOPING relationships will just “happen.”

And by pure probability, you will get a few relationships that just kind of organically pop up.

But if you can consciously build the skill of creating relationships, you’ll have an advantage over nearly everybody else.

How, exactly, do you create relationships?

It’s much easier than folks realize.

Create rapport, and ask the right questions.

Hold back on the judgment, and learn to appreciate other people’s ideas.

If you can do this, people will LOVE you.

Whether you’re building romantic relationships, friendships or potential business partnerships, the strategy is the same.

Ask the right questions in the right order, and let them be the star.

Learn How:

Secret Agent Persuasion

DNA of Success

Cut Through Their Social Anxiety

Most people have a certain amount of social anxiety.

Meaning that few people feel entirely comfortable around others.

If you define “total comfort” as how you feel when you are alone, and can say and do anything without worrying, then EVERYBODY has a form of “social anxiety.”

Everybody has things they feel comfortable saying and doing when they are alone, that they would NEVER do around others.

For example, have you ever been “caught” signing in the car?

You’re favorite tune is on, your belting it out along with the band, but then you glance around and somebody right next to you is watching you.

Few people would continue EXACTLY as they were before they were “caught.”

Even if you smile to yourself and change your volume, even slightly, you are responding because of social anxiety.

Sure, it may be perfectly acceptable social anxiety, but the structure is the same.

It’s also that same that keeps us from fully expressing ourselves the way we want.

Any time you have an idea in your head, and you imagine expressing it a certain way, but it comes out “differently” the inhibiting factor is social anxiety.

Social = You are around other people

Anxiety = An uncomfortable feeling of worry

Just that when people say, “I have social anxiety,” we assume they mean debilitating levels.

Like they can’t even go outside, or they vomit when they think of talking to attractive people.

But the truth is that EVERYBODY has anxiety of SOME level, whenever thinking about behaving socially.

It’s human nature.

Which is a good place to start from when intending to persuade anybody.

Why?

Because in order to persuade somebody, you have to put things in terms that they can understand.

(Unless you are using the, “do it my way or else” strategy).

Which means they have to be COMFORTALBE sharing with you something about what they want.

But most people, when you ask them, “What do you want?” aren’t going to feel comfortable telling you.

Even people who have been in intimate relationships have trouble telling each other what they want.

Luckily, there is a very EASY way to get them thinking about what they want.

A simple question process, which when used correctly, doesn’t even require that they speak.

Which means you can get deep inside their mind, and find their most treasured desires.

And since they’ll feel comfortable thinking and talking about those deepest desires with YOU, they’ll start to subconsciously associate those two things.

Their deepest desires and you.

Learn How:

Secret Agent Persuasion

Build Their Treasure

Help Them Find Their Treasure

Surprising people with gifts is a fun hobby.

Both giving and receiving.

When I was a kid we would have Easter egg hunts.

And my dad would make a “special” egg.

Whoever found it got $10.

Looking was as fun as finding.

But if you’ve even given secret presents to people, that’s just as fun.

Especially if you have a small gift (like jewelry) and hide it inside a big ugly box that’s wrapped up in newspaper or something.

There’s even “geocaching” where people hide stuff all over Earth.

And then others look for it based on the coordinates.

Then they find it, do something different to it (sign it or something) and then leave it for the next person.

The idea of “hidden treasure” is in a lot of places.

Stories, cultures, games, mythology, and on and on.

They say when we humans were first created, they put our greatest treasure in the one place we’d never look.

Deep within ourselves.

But with a few clever questions, you can help others find their treasure.

And not just the treasure, but that desire energy, the “treasure energy” that is underneath it.

And you can connect that “treasure energy” to anything.

Your product, your service, your ideas.

Even yourself.

The only “rule” is that you have to be ultra covert.

In order to find their hidden treasure, you have to hide your intentions.

You have to let THEM think THEY were the ones that found their treasure.

Of course, that is the greatest gift you can give somebody.

The pleasure of finding their own treasure.

Learn How:

Secret Agent Persuasion

Float Your Ideas Into Their Brain

Two Levels Of Truth

There’s a big difference between knowing something and truly understanding it.

There are a lot of “truisms” about life that people hear and repeat over and over.

Trouble is, we hear something so many times, it sort of “feels” like we “know it.”

But then we experience it in a deep and personal way, and have a completely different understanding of it.

But when we try and describe that deep and personal understanding, it sounds EXACTLY the same.

For example, everybody has heard the statement, “first believe it, then you’ll see it.”

People hear that, nod their heads knowingly.

“Yeah, right on brother!”

But few people have ever actually EXPERIENCED that.

Once I went rock climbing with a buddy of mine.

They rate climbs like they rate earthquakes, on a logarithmic scale.

A 6.0 climb, for example, is twice as hard as 5.0 climb. Just like for earthquakes.

At the time, the best I could do was a 5.4, maybe a 5.5 if I was feeling extra confident.

So my buddy says, “Hey, let’s do this one climb before we go home. It’s easy. It’s only a 5.4.”

I said, sure, no problem.

And like he said, it was easy.

But he’d tricked me.

It was really a 5.8. And he didn’t tell me until we were finished.

Had he told me before, I’d have been too scared.

But because I THOUGHT it was only a 5.4, it was easy.

First I believed it, then I “saw” (or experienced) it.

That experience, of BELIEVING something is true BEFORE you actually EXPERIENCE it as true is much different than spouting all the popular “Law of Attraction” statements that everybody knows.

Here’s another one that everybody knows, but at the same time, few have experienced.

“You can get anybody to do anything so long as you convince them it was their idea.”

No doubt, you’ve heard this a billion times.

EVERYBODY has.

But few people can actually do this.

Because this requires doing something that is pretty difficult.

Which is NOT take credit for their actions.

But if you can momentarily turn off your ego (which is the part of you that wants credit for your idea), you really CAN get anybody to do anything.

And it is MUCH EASIER than most people realize.

So easy that once you learn how, it’s a good idea to never, ever share these techniques.

Learn More:

Secret Agent Persuasion

Be Bold And Take The Leap

How To Properly Set The Hook

Think of what it’s like to be an attractive female.

Everywhere you go, guys are checking you out.

And everywhere you go, guys are trying all kinds of “game” to generate interest.

What does this mean?

Even if you use reasonably good “game,” she’ll still categorize you with all those other “players.”

Even if you game works, even if she finds you attractive anyway, she still is going to enjoy being chased.

In this scenario, girls are fishing, and men are fish.

The more you get the fish to chase the bait, the more committed they are.

Girls are programmed to do this.

It’s in their DNA.

Their ancient inner-selves want to know the guy she gets together with isn’t a short term player.

So even if you DO have very tight game, you still might need to work on her while.

Is this the ONLY way?

No, it is not.

Another way would be to get her interested in you WITHOUT her thinking you’re running any kind of game.

Girls love the idea of being “seduced” by a worthy male.

But they also love the idea of “magic.”

That feeling that just happens, without any logic.

When she can’t get you out of her mind, and she doesn’t know why.

This is the stuff epic romances are made of.

Of course, you still have to talk to her.

But since you won’t be using any overt seduction techniques, you don’t need to worry about any resistance.

Just talk to her as if you aren’t really interested.

And then spin a few nested loops.

The kind embedded with deep attraction generating technology.

Not only will it feel like magic (to her) it will be HER idea.

And YOU will be the one setting the hook.

Learn How:

Hypnotic Seduction

Alien Invasion

Stop Trying To Push Her Buttons

Most people think in terms of checkers.

They want something, and they to know how to get it.

Sometimes, this is easy.

If you want a snack out of a vending machine, you put in the right amount of money, and push the right buttons.

Simple checkers logic.

Linear “cause and effect.”

But some things are much more complicated.

Which means getting what you want will require a bit more thinking that linear “cause and effect.”

But even the most complicated things follow a certain set of rules.

Otherwise, we would be living in a completely random universe.

And since we’re not, there IS a repeatable strategy to get pretty much anything.

But sometimes that strategy can be pretty complicated.

Much TOO complicated for those who only want to insert right coins and push the right buttons.

But for those who are willing to stretch their brains, getting what you want is pretty easy.

Even if it’s the interest of an attractive woman.

All you’ve got to do is the right things in the right order.

What things?

Getting her feeling the right emotions in the right order.

How do you do that?

Most people go about it the roundabout way. Trying all kinds of different “techniques” that are supposed to be like “pushing buttons.”

But that can be hit and miss.

Instead of just pushing buttons, think about slowly moving her emotions.

Slowly increase one, wait for it to peak, and then slowly increase the next one.

This is much more like playing an instrument than pushing buttons on a machine.

How do you move her emotions in the right order?

By telling her the right stories in the right order.

Which stories are those?

These:

Hypnotic Seduction

Get Your Game Tight

Haphazard Seduction Patterns

Most people think that men and women are attracted to different things because men are visual but women are not.

This is only partially true.

It IS true that men and women are attracted to different things, but the “visual” part is not the whole story.

Men are attracted VERY QUICKLY. And that which makes us attracted is available to use visually.

Women, on the other hand, become attracted more slowly. And that which makes them attracted comes in through MORE sensory organs (sight, sound, hearing).

But that doesn’t mean they are less visual.

For example, she can tell VISUALLY from across the room whether you are confident or not.

How you move, your posture, etc.

But that’s not ENOUGH to make her physically and sexually attracted to you.

She needs to feel a lot of emotions in the right order.

Most guys try to create these emotions haphazardly.

They go the old school way, flowers, nice dates, etc.

Or they try “game.” Push pull, cocky funny, etc.

These CAN work, but they can also backfire.

It would be like trying to bake a cake blindfolded, only knowing that there is some mixing and cooking in there somewhere.

Most people don’t know WHY cocky and funny works, or WHY push-pull works.

Luckily, there is a much more efficient way.

One where you can create the right emotions in the right order.

This would be like baking a cake without the blindfold, with a step by step recipe.

Once you got the right recipe down, you can bake as many cakes as you want.

Over and over and over and over and over.

Learn How:

Hypnotic Seduction