There’s a saying in seduction circles that’s meant to keep guys from texting or calling too much.
(But it works both ways).
It’s based on a mistake so common you’ll see it in plenty romantic comedies.
If you make yourself too available, the other person will lose interest.
This, of course, is based on the law of scarcity.
If we think something is NOT scarce, (e.g. abundant and always available) we’ll value it less.
If we think something IS scarce, we’ll value it more, assuming we have some affinity for it in the first place.
The saying is to, “give her the gift of missing you.”
The idea being when a girl likes a guy, she likes thinking and wondering about him.
When she is “missing” and “thinking about” him, it will make seeing him much more valuable.
On the other hand, if he’s TOO available, it will kill her feelings.
You can apply this theory to your language.
If you are always extremely clear and specific about everything you talk about, you won’t give them anything to wonder about.
You’ll be known as “detail man” since you are always going into huge amounts of detail.
While this is nice, they’ll have very little reason to think about what you are saying.
You’ll be conditioning them to “turn off” their brains when they see you.
Since you speak in so much specific detail, they don’t need to think.
To them, you’ll be like a TED talk on YouTube.
You don’t require ANY amount of interactivity on their part.
This is fantastic if you just want to give speeches about interesting topics.
But it won’t let them wonder about you.
One of the cool things about many movies and literature is we can discuss what it MEANS.
Everybody can have their own interpretation.
But this isn’t possible when you speak with such specificity there is no way to “interpret” what you are saying.
Nobody gets together to talk about what TED talks “mean.”
The implications, yeah. But not the meaning.
But we LOVE talking about the “meaning” of characters and stories and ideas.
When you can make “specific vagueness” part of your natural communication style, you will give people the GIFT of “interpreting you.”
Or wondering about what you really “mean.”
You’ll also develop the “aura” that most people like, but have zero idea how to CREATE.
Of somebody who is intensely interesting, but nobody is quite sure why.