Monthly Archives: December 2008

Develop Powers of Instant Deep and Peaceful Sleep Anywhere, Anytime

You roll over, nervously glance at the clock. 2:46. Ugh. You need to wake up in less than 5 hours. Roll back over. Sleep. Sleep. You need to sleep. Focus. The more you worry, the more awake you become. You roll back over, afraid to rest your eyes on the soft glow from clock, taunting you with the ever increasing speed with which it reminds you of your increasingly disappearing night. 2:58. Less tired. More awake. This goes on for the entire night. An eternity of rapidly increasing anxiety fueled thoughts racing around your head. Finally you feel the long awaited sleep which beckons you to blissful unconsciousness. MMmm. Feels wonderful, worries melting away, sleep, soft warm, dreamy escape. Just as you nod off…

BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Crap!  What, only two minutes of sleep is all I get? Why does this always happen? You know exactly what I”m talking about, because there is an obvious conspiracy of alarm clocks which somehow magically keep us awake until just moments before their alarm is set, at which time they maliciously send out some kind of trans-dimensional sleep inducing alarm clock voodoo only to cause us anguish. Who is setting whom?

It doesn’t have to be this way. You can train yourself to fall sleep easily and naturally every night so you can rest peacefully, and enjoy those dreams that you can interpret for your benefit.  You can wake up  and notice that you feel refreshed and rested so that you can overcome any challenge the day can dream up to throw at you, unaware that you now possess super sleep skills.

What exactly is the skill? Easy to learn, and you will receive immediate benefit once you naturally put it into practice. Some call it focused attention, others call it trans-hemispheric dialogue, but you probably know the ancient name of counting sheep. But with a twist.

What it does is allows you to develop a mental conversation between your right and left brains. One side is used to visualizing, imagination, while the other side is used for the creation of speech (among about billion other really fascinating stuff.) The idea is to create enough brain fatigue, so it eventually just gives up and you are consequently out like a light.

Here’s how to do it.

As you lay there, finished with your day. Close your eyes. (Ok, not right now because you need to read this.) Allow whatever you see in your imagination. Describe it, to yourself, in your mind. As you see it. Be careful not to create any images, just follow your imagination with your description of it.  Allow it to go wherever it goes, and describe it, to youself, in your mind, in as much detail as you can imagine. Here is an example:

Ok, I see a field, a green field with some trees off to the left, and now I see a rocking chair,and at the bottom of the rocking chair is an old pair of shoes, and one of the shoes is on the left side, and the other shoe, is, wait, ok, now there are a bunch of chickens, and, wait, there’s my mom, and no, wait, there is that guy I knew in elementary school, and, wait, there’s, no wait, theres..z..z.z.z.zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Next thing you know, it’s morning.

You get the idea.

And the more you practice this technique, the more you will be able to fall asleep faster and faster, and pretty soon you will be able to train your body to fall asleep and recharge your mind and body in so many fascinating ways you’ll wonder why you didn’t discover this earlier.

And of course, if you remember to come back often, and read more articles, you can easily begin to realize just how much potential you have inside you, right now, to do those things that you’ve always wanted to do.

And if you want, you can also share this site with others as well, because the more you share, the more there is.  And that’s good for everybody.

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Develop Powerful Appreciation

There is a scene in the incredible movie Taxi Driver where the main character is holding his hand above the open fire of his stove, in order to strengthen himself, or perhaps to prove to himself how tough he is. The power of this scene is that the character, who is completely psycho, holds his hand above the stove without flinching. Stone faced. The reason this is such a powerful scene is the audience can’t help but to imagine how incredibly painful that must feel.

Psychological experts know that the only two fears humans are born with are heights and loud noises. The rest we have to learn. How long do you think it took you to realize that fire was dangerous? A second? Less? Have you ever drank too much of a certain liquor (for me it was Tequila) and then later just couldn’t even stand the smell of it? How long do you think it took your brain to learn that liquor is poison, and you should stay away from it? (Or at least too much of it.) Probably not very long.  How long did it take to learn that speaking in public could be a dangerous thing? Probably not very long. Probably all it took was once in second or third grade when you spoke out in class and the results weren’t quite what you expected.

Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe you’re one of the lucky ones that can feel really comfortable whenever you stand up and speak persuasively with confidence and charisma as if you were Cicero speaking to the Roman Senate. If you are that confident, I’ll be sure to vote for you when you run for congress. The rest of us will have to continue hiding behind our 3×5 cards. 

The reason we learn so fast to be afraid of things is naturally because it is matter of safety.  If you’ve read the article on memory, you know that pain, or potential pain is one of the key elements of forming a strong neural connection.

But what about learning skills that are enhancing? How cool would it be if we were able to learn new habits as quickly as we learned our fears?  What if we could unlearn false fears, and replace them with feelings of safety as easily as we learned real, physical fears?

In order to do that, we need to charge our neural pathways with the same strong emotions that we charged them when we learned it was dangerous to stick our fingers in a light socket. (It only took me once to learn that was a bad idea.)

Let’s take exercise as an example. You get up in the morning. Look at the clock. Ugh. It’s cold outside. If you didn’t get out of bed and go for a walk like you were hoping to, you’d get an extra hour of sleep. You could always starting walking tomorrow, right? But if it didn’t have to be that way? What if you could train your brain to automatically feel motivated when your alarm went off? What if the idea of going for a walk made you feel as good as the prospect of polishing off a bucket of ice cream?

The emotion to use when training your brain for good habits is appreciation. We humans like to worry. Whenever something good happens, some of us have a voice in the back of our heads saying “I don’t know, this might not last very long.” I’m sure that’s happened to you at least once, right? The key to increasing appreciating for something, is to quiet those voices that silently nag you. And the way to do that is through simple practice. The more you focus on your appreciation, for anything, the more it grows. It’s just like exercise for your brain. It doesn’t take long. Take a deep breath, and really feel appreciation for the air as it comes in your lungs. Feel appreciationthat you can use the internet to read email from your friends, read cool articles, and learn fascinating stuff.  Feel appreciation for anything. The more you practice this, the more you will naturally notice that it gets easier and easier. 

Experiment with this for the next week. Pick a color. Lets say red. Everytime you see the color red, appreciate something. Anything. Only for a few moments. The more you practice, the stronger it gets. And when you develop the natural ability to feel appreciation, you will realize something amazing. I’ll leave to you to find out exactly what that amazing discovery is.

You can relax, and feel comfortable, because I’ll be posting many more articles on exactly how to use your new versatile skills of appreciation in the near future.

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The Greatest Gift

I remember being a kid on christmas morning. Waking up early. Actually getting out of bed early after having not been able to sleep all night. You know how when you lay there all night, maybe it wasn’t christmas eve, but you just couldn’t help to expect somethig wonderful?  Like you couldn’t wait to leap out of bed because you knew you were going to receive something fantastic?

Gifts are cool that way. When you take a normal, everyday thing, like a book, or a CD, and as you wrap it up in a nice package, it takes on an almost mysterious quality.  When you receive it, you don’t know what is inside. Your mind begins to wonder what it is. And because it is carefully wrapped, maybe with a ribbon, you start to assume good things about it. This is something wonderful, you think. This is something really special, you hope.  You are sure that this is something you are going to really enjoy.

Like when you see something, and you are not sure what’s inside. Sometimes people give those gifts that are wrapped up in box after box after until the gift is nestled nicely and safely deep inside, where it was waiting for you to discover it. And you do realize that opening the gift is half the fun, don’t you? And when somebody puts all that time and effort into something, knowing you will enjoy the discovery, that in and of itself is really fantastic, isn’t it?

Imagine, now, if you will, the best gift you ever recieved. The coolest present somebody ever gave you. The most wonderfully wrapped package that you ever had the pleasure of being able to discover what is inside. You might have gotten a bike, or a car, or even a stack of money. What was the coolest gift you were able to ever give yourself to somebody else?  What was the most fun you had hiding something you knew somebody else would be able to discover this?

Do you know what the greatest gift is? The greatest gift that be a source of joy and and wonder and support for as many people as you can imagine? The greatest gift that can help people through tough times, and let people know that anything is achievable if you set your mind, right? The gift that can convince people that no matter how bad things are, you can always overcome them? That no matter what other people think or say or do, you always have yourself, and your choices? Do you really know what the greatest gift ever is?

You.

But you already knew that, didn’t you?

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Easily Remember Names and Impress Your Friends

“Oh Hi!”
“What’s up?”
“Nothing much, same old. Ya know.”
“Who’s your friend?”
“Oh, this is, uh, um, jeez,” blush, “I’m sorry, what was your name again?”

Don’t you hate when this happens? How would you like to learn a technique that once practiced, would ensure that you always remember peoples names? Do you think you could find this new skill you’re about to learn useful? Don’t worry, it’s easy, however, it does take a bit of mental practice once you easily remember the simple technique.

It’s similar to the pegging technique from that other article. If you haven’t, you might consider to read it, as it has useful background on memory in general.

This way is specific to remembering peoples names. The first step in remembering somebody’s name is to make the conscious choice to remember it before you hear it. Most people hear a name, and then later wonder why they can’t remember it. Memory is an active process, not an automatic one, unless there is one or both of those magic ingredients I mentioned earlier involved. Then it’s easy to remember.

So here’s what you need to do. When you see somebody that you are likely to meet, grab the first thing that jumps out about that person. Anything. Hair, shirt, tie, shoes, belt, nose, ears, eyes.  Since you are keeping this completely to yourself, it is ok to be a little bit mean, but remember to keep it to yourself. Say you see a guy, and he has a really really really big nose. We’re talking Pinocchio big. So immediately, you think of him as Mr. Big Nose. The more you add to it, the better. Like if he has really overgrown nose hair or something, fantastic.

So you meet the guy, and he introduces himself as Mike. Quick, what do you think of IMMEDIATELY when you hear Mike?  For me it was microphone. (As this example is based on a true story.) So now you have to connect Mr. Big Nose to Mike, or Microphone. In my particular example, I imagined the guy with three or microphones swing out of his nose as he walked around. And every time he turned his head, they would swing and crash into the people around him. After that, it was automatic to remember the name ‘Mike’ when I saw him. If you are worried about thinking unkind thoughts about somebody you’ve never met, keep in mind that remembering a persons name is the biggest compliment you can give them.

Another example. I was at a resort, sitting at the bar. I was going to be there for a week, so I thought it would be a good idea to get friendly with the bartender. The first thing I noticed was his unique hairstyle. While I don’t remember exactly how he had it, just that it was the first thing I remembered. He introduced himself as ‘Fred.” Hmm. Fred. Fred. Fred. I immediately thought of the scene in ‘Pulp Fiction.” Now because in the scene ‘Butch’ says “Zed’s dead,” instead of Fred, I had to include a picture of Fred Mertz from “I Love Lucy” just to make sure. So in my picture, I had this guys unique hair, dragging a bunch of dead people (including Mr. Mertz.) So the next time I saw him, I saw the hair, and the dead people (just like that little kid) and immediately say “Hey Fred!” Of course because I called him by name everytime, I never had any problems getting served right away, and my bill at the end of the week was at least half of what it should have been.

Now if you are worried about coming up with pictures for names on the spot, you can practice by finding a list of baby names and practice with those until you get the hang it. It’s that simple. When you get this technique down it will start to happen automatically, and not only with your old friends be amazed, but you will be collecting wonderful new friends as well.

Be sure to check back often, and read more articles on how you can improve yourself, and get a different perspective on reality. And after you master this simple memory technique and impress your friends, you’ll be sure to tell them about this site, won’t you?

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Fourth Chakra-Heart Chakra

Powerfully connect with strangers as if you’ve known each other your whole life. Feel such deep compassion that the freeing power of forgiveness is nearly automatic. Be able to understand all issues from multiple points of view, and develop ideas that will encourage everybody to agree.

This comes naturally when you understand the powerof the Fourth Chakra. The Fourth Chakra, anahata, or the Heart Chakra is located deep in the center of your chest at your spine. The associated color is green. The Fourth Chakra is associated with compassion, understanding, forgiveness, and love. Before you begin thepowerful Heart Chakra meditation, ask yourself the following questions. Remember, it’s not important to receive clear answers, rather to remain open, so that when you are ready, the answers will become evident.

What is keeping me from forgiving those that wronged me?

What is similar between me and those I label as my enemies?

How can I find the positive intention in all peoples action?

How can I powerfully and truthfully feel love and compassion for myself?

As you ponder these questions, quiet your mind. Breath slowly. In. Out. In. Out. As you breath in the love and compassion from the infinite mystical energy of the universe, hold it for a moment, and imagine a transfer of energy to your Heart Center. Exhale slowly. Inhale, hold and transfer energy. With each transfer of energy, imagine a ball of green light expanding in your chest. Keep breathing and out, until the ball of green light is completely surrounding you. Protecting you. Keeping you in the pure energy of love and compassion. Sit in the ball of energy for seven long, slow, full breaths. Hold each breath for a moment, and allow the green energy to transform you.

After the seven breaths, slowly shrink the ball of energy back down inside your chest. No hurry. Any speed that you are comfortable with is fine.

How does it feel now to have the love and compassion of the universe inside your chest, next to your heart, waiting to help you support yourself whenever you need it? Good? Good.

Please come back often to read more articles on things that can help you improve yourself. And because I will be updating this site frequently, please feel free to share or link this site with others.

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Instantly Develop a Powerful Memory

Have you ever wished you could develop a potent memory that would cause you to never ever again need to write anything down? Have you ever been amazed by those guys on TV who could instantly memorize a room full of people that they’d just met? Can you imagine how cool you’d look to a room full of your friends when you stand up to give a speech with absolutely no note-cards whatsoever? Well, after you read this article and put these techniques into practice you’ll be able to easily develop such incredibly powerful mental skills you’ll not only have useful strategies but a set of wildly entertaining party skills. Ready?

The basic method is to learn a technique called pegging. This is a wild form of association.  Association is when you immediately link two ideas or words together. Like for example, when you think of the word baseball, you might immediately think of glove, or bat, or stadium. That is an association. Technically it’s because inside your brain there’s a strong neural connection between those two words. The idea behind pegging is to create a strong association between something that you already know well, to that which you want to remember.

Normally, these associations take time and effort. Like spelling. Many words don’t follow any normal spelling rules, like psychology, for example. The only way to remember to spell it without thinking is to write it over and over. Similarly, unless you can count really fast in your head, the only way to remember that 12 x 12 = 144 is to repeat the equation enough times so that you can create a strong neural connection.

However, pegging is an easier, quicker, and much more fun way to do this. Here are the simple steps:

Step 1: Create a list of items that you already know inside and out. For example, five things that are almost alwasy in your bedroom. (Like your bed for example.)

Step 2: Create an itemized list of the things you want to remember. Points in a speech, items at the grocery store, steps of the Kreb cycle, anything will work.

Step 3: Create a fantastically crazy cartoonish action and sensory filled picture containing any item from Steps 1 and 2 from above. It helps to involved yourself in this action cartoon picture. And if you are comfortable with it, add in the two secret ingredients (more on these later.)

For example, let’s say you are going to the store, and you need to buy eggs. You choose an item from your bedroom, let’s say your bed. So then you need to create a fantastical mind movie starring the eggs and your beds.  How about this: You are really tired, and you walk into your bedroom and collapse on your bed. Only somebody has put about a thousand eggs under your sheets, and all the runny egg stuff oozes out all over you, in your hair, under your clothes, inside your socks, between your toes. Or how about this: You come home, tired liked before, only this time you go to collapse on our bed, but you realize too late that your bed has magically changed into a giant egg, complete with sheets and covers and bed spread. As you collapse on your bed/egg it naturally breaks, but only partially and you find yourself inside a giant egg with all the bedsheets soaked in egg goo, and wrapped around you. Make sure to really feel the egg goo in your mind as you create this picture. It sounds complicated, but it really only takes a couple seconds.

So after you easily create this image, when you go to the store, and think of your bed, the egg image will instantly pop into your head.  You peg things to items in your bedroom, your bathroom, your car, any landmarks between your place and the closest 7-11, anything will work.

After you practice for a while, you’ll naturally become extremely proficient. I once gave a demonstration in front of a speech class I was taking.  People were amazed. When you do this, especially at parties or happy hours, people will think that you are a genius. Which, actually, you are as you start to use these mind development techniques that many others, like you, have learned.

And the secret ingredients? Sex and pain. Yep. If you involved sex and pain in your picture, it will be impossible NOT to remember it. Just make sure to keep the sex and the pain involving yourself (and the eggs and the bed in the above examples.) Be as graphic and creative as possible, but make sure not to let anybody peek inside your head while you are doing this, because they might think you are a little weird. And be sure that after you do this at parties and impress your friends with your new super powerful memory techniques, not to tell them about the sex and the pain part. You might be walking home.

Make sure to check back often to read these articles.  Because I will be posting as often as possible, please link or share this site as well.

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OH BABY!

I was sitting in a coffee shop yesterday, minding my own business, when a young, happily beeming woman walked in carrying a very recent addition to the human race. Tightly bundled in a comfortable looking baby sling, his head poked out and his eyes looked around, ceaselessly amazed at the colors and lights and sounds and activity. Imprinting his fresh young brain with stimuli to later categorize into learnings and beliefs and ideas about who is he and how he fits into all this amazing unfolding of stuff that is always presenting itself to us.

I tried to think back to when I learned something, really able to truly discover something and give it meaning. Through some slippery power of thought, connect cause to effect. When I first noticed that when you turn that round thing on the door, that other part that looks like it’s the same material goes in and out of the side of the door.  Or when you are holding those sort of round white things, and you open your hands, they fall and crack open on the ground into a yellow gooey mess. Or those squiggly lines that my first grade teacher wrote on the board, and made us copy over and over, that had no meaning at the time, but later, through some voodoo magic that I am still trying to wrap my mind around, became letters with which I could build words and sentences and express complicated ideas and desires and plans that were inside my head, waiting for me to give them life.

But then I realized that something happens to us as we grow old. For some reason, we stop being able to see the world as an exciting unfolding of learning and discovery.  We somehow learn, or believe, or pretend, that once we get to a certain level of knowledge, the learning stops.  We trick ourselves into thinking that instead of being people who always find new and exciting things to learn about, we slip into the comfortable habit of doing, instead of becoming. Does it have to be that way? Do we have to give up any idea that we are able to continuously learn and grow and change? And if we do change and learn, does it have to be to satisfy some external requirements by society? Can we not set our own course of our lives so that we can not merely serve others, but to serve others in a way that can benefit us both?

As the young woman sat down to join her friends, they all took turns holding young child. A child who has a long journey ahead of him. Clearly enjoying the support of the caring adults around him. Well equiped by nature to pull from his environment all the resources he will need to survive and thrive. In his young mind the few, yet to be voiced thoughts soon to be joined by many others. The thoughts we all too soon let go of. The thoughts we should never forget, as they can help us to master our reality in any stage of our life.

What is this?

What does it mean?

How can I use it? How can I share it?

I like it! How can I get more?

 

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Follow The Yellow Brick Road

“Yea, but I’m not sure if you understand what I mean.”
“I think I have a general idea of what you mean.”
“I’m starting to think you really don’t.”
“So tell me again, what is it exactly that you think you mean?”
“Ok. I went into the bank.”
“Did you want to get a loan?”
“No, no, that was last week.”
“Did the loan come through yet?”
“Well, yea, I mean, no, not yet, but it’s guaranteed.”
“You mean like guaranteed, guaranteed?”
“No, not like that, I mean, I should get it, it’s just a matter of time.”
“I got ya. So what’s the problem. What happened today?”
“Well, I was about to ask the teller about the hair thing she was wearing…”
“Hair thing?”
“Yea, you know, those things they wear in the back, like some giant pony tail clip, but it has like a design on it or something…”
“Yea, I know what you’re talking about. I bought one for my girlfriend once.”
“Lisa?”
“No, no my ex girlfriend, from like three years ago.”
“Oh, yea, ok. I remember her. Cheryl, right?”
“Charlene.”
“Oh yea. You still talk?”
“No, not really. Not like we’re mad. The split was cool and everything.”
“So you never see her?”
“Sometimes, I saw her at the club a few weeks ago.”
“The club? I thought you said you quit that a long time ago? Too loud or something?”
“No..no… I saw her at the gym.”
“Got it.”
“So tell me about this girl with a clipboard?”
“A clip, man a clip.”
“What, a paper clip? You got yelled at by a girl with a paper clip?”
“No, dude, one of those clips in her hair.”
“Oh, yea. Ok. So why’d she yell at you?”
“I don’t know. That’s the thing. On the hair clip were all those old wizard of oz dudes.”
“You mean like the lion and the scarecrow, and that other metal guy?”
“The tin man.”
“Yea, the tin man.”
“So which one is your favorite?”
“The lion, dude, the lion.”
“Why the lion?”
“Cause he always had his courage inside the whole time, and he finally figured out.”
“Yea, that is cool. So what did Miss Oz say to you that upset you so much?”
“Well nothing really.”
“What do you mean, nothing really?”
“Well I was just going to tell her I liked her head clip oz thing, and she turned and said ‘HANG ON!'”
“Did you ask her what she meant?”
“I didn’t get a chance, because she hung up the phone and stormed off.”
“Um, wait a sec. She was on the phone?”
“Well, yea.”
“So she looked at you when she said that? Pointed at you or something, right?”
“Well not really.”
“So how did you know she was yelling at you and not at some guy over the phone?”
“She yelled at me the exact same way my mom used to yell at me when I was a kid.”
“And you think she went out of her way to research your past and dig up some secret recordings and listen to them and practice screaming just like your mom used to, and then sat there and waited, and pretended to be on the phone? And..”
“Dude…”
“And she even found out you liked the cowardly lion so she wore that specific hair oz clipboard thing on purpose just to lure you in so she could lower the boom on you and then stomp off without even waiting to see how you’d respond?”
“Well when you put it like that…”
“Dude, you should go offer an apology and an invitation to go see The Wizard of Oz, there’s a special showing tonight over at The Triplex.”
“Dude, really? Tonight? The Triplex? That place over the Anderson’s?”
“No, dude, that’s the duplex. You want the Triplex, over on 17th.”
“Hmm. Yea, that’s a pretty idea, man. I think I’ll do that.”
“Well you better hurry up before whatever guy was on the phone changes his mind.”
“Jeez, you’re right. See ya around man. Thanks.”
“Later.”

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Third Chakra

Move through life with power. Consider the opinions and judgements of others while maintaining the complete freedom to disregard them at will. Spin your mind in new and directions for incredibly insightful creativity. Have a supreme autonomy of will to resist even the strongest of temptations.

All this can be yours when you accept the power of the Third Chakra. The Third Chakra, known in some circles as manipura, is centered just below the sternum at the solar plexus. The color is yellow. The Third Chakra is responsible for mainting emotional stability, individuality, and creativity. And because you are naturally capable of being able to tap this source, you can begin to imagine the power that will come when manipura is your ally. Ask yourself the following questions before you begin your meditation. Keep in mind that you don’t need to find answers right away, simply because you are able to honestly ask these questions of yourself and to remain open to answers in whatever form, you will receive benefit.

Who are you?
Who are you before you ask this?
Before you were born, who were you?
Who are you that answers this question?
What if?
How can project safety and calm the emotions of others simply by being near?
What else is there?
Are you?

Breath deeply, in, out. In. Out. Imagine a small ball of bright yellow light emerge just where your stomach meets your ribs. Slowly. In. Out. Breath in the source emotional energy with your inhale, and as you hold it for a brief moment, allow it to charge the yellow ball. As you exhale slowly, allow the yellow ball to slightly increase in size. Slowly. In. Out.  Repeat this process until the yellow ball is surrounding you.  Protecting you. Keeping you safe and separate. Your own thoughts. Your own beliefs. Your emotions obeying your wishes. Sit inside this ball for seven long, slow breaths. That’s right. In. Out. Allow the yellow ball to slowly shrink down, until it returns into your solar plexus.

How does that feel now, knowing that you have such incredible power and safety and strenth,  Just below your heart, ready for you whenever you need it? When you walk through the world now, what will people see in you that is different? What will people see in you that they are now naturally drawn to because of your subtle yet powerful increase in strength? How many ways can you think of to connect with them?

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Good Job!

“I don’t know man, I just seem like I’m, I dunno, stuck or something.”

“What do you mean stuck?”

“I mean everything I try, it just seems like I’m in the same place. Like I keep running and running and I’m not going forward or anything. Like if I stop, I’ll fall behind or something. It sucks.”

“So what would you like it to be like?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean what would you like it to be like. If you could snap your fingers, and magically make everything the way you want it, with regard to this thing, what would you see or feel or hear that would be different than it is now?”

“Well, for one, my boss could tell me I”m doing a good job.”

“Are you doing a good job?”

“Of course.”

“How do you know?”

“Because I know what my job is, and I know when I’m doing it right, and when I’m doing it wrong. I’ve been there for over five years, you know.”

“I know. I know. So when you do a good job, and you know you’re doing a good job, how does it get better when your boss says something to you?  Do you think that he doesn’t know you are doing a good job?”

“No, if I wasn’t doing a good job, he would know, and he would ask me what was wrong.”

“He wouldn’t just yell at you? Tell you to do it better?”

“No, he knows I know what I’m doing. So if I started slacking off, he’d think maybe something was wrong, something at home or something.”

“Wow, sounds like a pretty good boss. I wish my boss was like that sometimes.”

“Yea.”

“So maybe he doesn’t say ‘good job,’ because he knows that you know, and that would mean that he really respects your opinion of yourself. Do you know how rare that is today? For somebody to know you well enough, and know and respect your own opinion of yourself?”

“Yea, I guess that is pretty cool.”

“So maybe you should tell him, ‘good job,’ huh?”

“Hmm. Maybe I will. Maybe I will.”

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