Follow The Yellow Brick Road

“Yea, but I’m not sure if you understand what I mean.”
“I think I have a general idea of what you mean.”
“I’m starting to think you really don’t.”
“So tell me again, what is it exactly that you think you mean?”
“Ok. I went into the bank.”
“Did you want to get a loan?”
“No, no, that was last week.”
“Did the loan come through yet?”
“Well, yea, I mean, no, not yet, but it’s guaranteed.”
“You mean like guaranteed, guaranteed?”
“No, not like that, I mean, I should get it, it’s just a matter of time.”
“I got ya. So what’s the problem. What happened today?”
“Well, I was about to ask the teller about the hair thing she was wearing…”
“Hair thing?”
“Yea, you know, those things they wear in the back, like some giant pony tail clip, but it has like a design on it or something…”
“Yea, I know what you’re talking about. I bought one for my girlfriend once.”
“No, no my ex girlfriend, from like three years ago.”
“Oh, yea, ok. I remember her. Cheryl, right?”
“Oh yea. You still talk?”
“No, not really. Not like we’re mad. The split was cool and everything.”
“So you never see her?”
“Sometimes, I saw her at the club a few weeks ago.”
“The club? I thought you said you quit that a long time ago? Too loud or something?”
“… I saw her at the gym.”
“Got it.”
“So tell me about this girl with a clipboard?”
“A clip, man a clip.”
“What, a paper clip? You got yelled at by a girl with a paper clip?”
“No, dude, one of those clips in her hair.”
“Oh, yea. Ok. So why’d she yell at you?”
“I don’t know. That’s the thing. On the hair clip were all those old wizard of oz dudes.”
“You mean like the lion and the scarecrow, and that other metal guy?”
“The tin man.”
“Yea, the tin man.”
“So which one is your favorite?”
“The lion, dude, the lion.”
“Why the lion?”
“Cause he always had his courage inside the whole time, and he finally figured out.”
“Yea, that is cool. So what did Miss Oz say to you that upset you so much?”
“Well nothing really.”
“What do you mean, nothing really?”
“Well I was just going to tell her I liked her head clip oz thing, and she turned and said ‘HANG ON!'”
“Did you ask her what she meant?”
“I didn’t get a chance, because she hung up the phone and stormed off.”
“Um, wait a sec. She was on the phone?”
“Well, yea.”
“So she looked at you when she said that? Pointed at you or something, right?”
“Well not really.”
“So how did you know she was yelling at you and not at some guy over the phone?”
“She yelled at me the exact same way my mom used to yell at me when I was a kid.”
“And you think she went out of her way to research your past and dig up some secret recordings and listen to them and practice screaming just like your mom used to, and then sat there and waited, and pretended to be on the phone? And..”
“And she even found out you liked the cowardly lion so she wore that specific hair oz clipboard thing on purpose just to lure you in so she could lower the boom on you and then stomp off without even waiting to see how you’d respond?”
“Well when you put it like that…”
“Dude, you should go offer an apology and an invitation to go see The Wizard of Oz, there’s a special showing tonight over at The Triplex.”
“Dude, really? Tonight? The Triplex? That place over the Anderson’s?”
“No, dude, that’s the duplex. You want the Triplex, over on 17th.”
“Hmm. Yea, that’s a pretty idea, man. I think I’ll do that.”
“Well you better hurry up before whatever guy was on the phone changes his mind.”
“Jeez, you’re right. See ya around man. Thanks.”