We are instinctively programmed to recognize a good leader.
And we are similarly turned off by false “eaders.”
A leader, of course, is somebody who LEADS.
Somebody who goes first.
Somebody we WANT to follow.
On the other hand, false leaders have figured out a way to FORCE us to follow them.
Throughout human history, there has been a mix of both.
This comes across conversationally as well.
Some people make us feel comfortable, open, safe.
Others either force us on the spot, or force us to listen to them blather on and on.
If you can make people feel comfortable, relaxed and open, they’ll tell you anything.
What they want, how they want it, and what they want to do with it.
This, of course, gives you a lot of leverage.
If you can creatively figure out a way to show them they can get what they want by helping you get what you want, you can create some pretty good relationships.
And if there’s one skill that will help in nearly every area of life, it’s the ability to create relationships.
Most people kind of drift around, HOPING relationships will just “happen.”
And by pure probability, you will get a few relationships that just kind of organically pop up.
But if you can consciously build the skill of creating relationships, you’ll have an advantage over nearly everybody else.
How, exactly, do you create relationships?
It’s much easier than folks realize.
Create rapport, and ask the right questions.
Hold back on the judgment, and learn to appreciate other people’s ideas.
If you can do this, people will LOVE you.
Whether you’re building romantic relationships, friendships or potential business partnerships, the strategy is the same.
Ask the right questions in the right order, and let them be the star.