Most everybody would like to know the “secret” to success.
Even the movie, “The Secret,” capitalized on our common desire for hidden knowledge.
The idea is that if we find that allegedly secret “idea” that other people know, but are keeping to themselves, then we’ll get what they get.
This is not a new idea.
One description of human history is the long story of us humans doing everything we can to make things safer, and easier.
It’s as if we have a constantly running program in the back of our minds that is ALWAYS saying, “There’s got to be an easier way of doing this…”
After all, every single invention has been made to make things easier.
Even doctors back in the old days, when operating on fallen soldiers, (while the poor dude was screaming his brains out) was thinking that.
“Damn, there’s got to be a better way to cut people open, fix them, and sew them back up….”
So the idea about a “secret” way of doing things is very normal.
Sure, some “shortcuts” may take you through a forest where you end up getting eaten by cannibals, but other shortcuts actually work.
And work well.
But sometimes, the “secret” is not what we DO, but what we STOP doing.
Humans are equally curious because we keep doing things, just because we did them before.
Even when they make zero sense today.
Many religions have these ideas built in.
Things that were actually dangerous back in the day, but they keep doing for their significance, not because of the danger.
What’s really difficult is when we KNOW what NOT to do, but we do it anyway.
This is VERY common in the beginning stages of relationships.
You like somebody, you aren’t sure if they like you.
You are DESPERATE to tell them how you feel.
Unfortunately, doing this almost GUARNATEES you’ll ruin everything before it starts.
Because love is an inside game.
It happens when would-be lovers are apart, and thinking about each other.
And crucially, when they are thinking about each other and are UNCERTAIN how the other feels about them.
As soon as they KNOW you love them and will do anything for them, it kind of kills the mystery, the suspense, and the romance.
That’s why in the beginning, what you DON’T DO is just as important was what you DO.
Luckily, there is a very helpful strategy to go by.
So you aren’t guessing.