Tag Archives: Decisions

What’s the Main Course of Your Mind?

I was out shopping this morning, and I bumped into a friend of mine. She is the kind of friend that you can catch right back up with after along absence without missing  beat. It’s great when you can make friends like that. She was shopping for a dinner party is planning on having next weekend. She belongs to a book club, and they get together to read different books and discuss them. The group only has six members, but she says they are a tight group because they all share the same interests as far as books go, and they can discuss the latest novel for hours on end.  They usually meet in a bookstore or a coffee shop, but once every couple of months they meet at one of the members house, and this is her turn. When I bumped into her, she was having trouble finding what she was looking for. She’d found this really interesting recipe, but she neglected to bring it with her to the supermarket, so she couldn’t really remember what was in it, as she’d never cooked it before. She was on the fence between guessing, and going home to get it.

Sometimes when you have a difficult decision to make, it can be frustrating. You think about going one way, and then you suddenly change your mind and think about going the other way. Sometimes it seems that the more you think about it, the more difficult the decision can become. What can even make things worse is when you have several people involved and everybody wants to go in different directions. It can be absolutely maddening. I was on a hiking trip, and we didn’t take the time to plan ahead, so when difficulties came up, we had to spend a long time discussing which way to go. Once we came upon a trail that was closed due to maintenance, and we stood there and argued for what seemed like an hour trying to figure out what alternative route to take.

And when you think about it, there are always alternative routes to take. Even if there is only one road, there are different times you can travel this road and find things of value here. I took a seminar once, shortly after new years, on goal setting. The guy said that setting goals is much better than making resolutions. He said that the more clear you are when you choose your desire, the more flexible you can be with how you get there. The problem most people have, he said, was that their desire that they’ve chosen is kind of vague, so when they think they are making progress, they are actually going in the wrong direction. Because they weren’t able to set a clear goal, they aren’t able to see the results they achieve when they get there.

As it turns out, while we were standing their arguing, a couple came walking up from one of our two choices. We asked where’d they came from, and they said that down this trail was a fantastic lake, and a big meadow with many wildflowers. And we decided to take this way, in part because they seemed to describe it so enthusiastically. And when other people describe things enthusiastically, you know there is something good here.

So I asked my friend if she was having some old friends over for dinner, or trying to impress a first date. She knew where I was going with this and realized the recipe wasn’t the most important thing. The most important thing was having a group of close friends over to discuss this really good book they’d all separately had the experience of reading and enjoying this, and were going to share it. The dinner was just a side dish, not the main course of the evening.

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How to Decide Properly

I had a friend who was always buying the latest kitchen gadgets on tv. He bought everything he came across whenever they showed those infomercials. I have to admit some of that stuff looks pretty good, but my friend would buy things, and then never use them. Or he would buy them and then use them only once. He would get really excited when the package arrived, and would usually open it, get all excited, go to the store and buy a bunch of stuff, usually more stuff than he needed to make whatever the contraption was supposed to make. I don’t know if you’ve ever done something like, but a bunch of stuff that you didn’t need.

I remember once he was talking about taking a trip to Australia. He had just a commercial sponsored by the Australian department of tourism, and they made it look pretty interesting. I’ve never actually seen a kangaroo in the wild. One thing though, is that he is afraid of flying. So he kind of looked into buying a boat ticket, but he couldn’t’ really find anything other than cruise lines that went down there. He had a bad experience on a cruise once, where he spent way too much money on things that you are not supposed to spend a lot of money on. Luckily, it was before he got married, so he didn’t get into any trouble with his wife.

It’s weird when you stop and think, because the reason those infomercials make so much money is from impulse buyers. I remember when I was a kid and I had a allowance, when you had to save for what you wanted. You couldn’t rely on impulse to guide you. You had to take a step back, and consider what it was that you wanted, because you only made a quarter a week, or whatever your allowance used to be. And when you focus on what you want, and save your money or find odd jobs to do (I used to mow lawns), it makes it easier to enjoy this, when you are able to buy what you want. Instead of being suckered into something that you don’t even know why you are buying it in the first place.

And he actually never went to Australia, because the time he took trying to find a boat other than a cruise ship took longer than his excitement lasted. So patience won out, as it usually does, because something like that knows how to wait. And when your brain decides to have a contest between two emotions, the one that doesn’t mind waiting around is the one that is going to win.

Which is eventually what his wife did. She enforced a strict rule where he wasn’t allowed to watch TV and hold a credit card at the same time. It wasn’t like she gave him pin money or anything, but he knew that if he bought something from TV, he would have to ask her permission, and if he still wanted it by the time they got around to going to the electronic store, then they bought it. She got to save them money, and he got to realize that a lot of things that he was buying were things that he really didn’t want in the first place.
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Tap the Wisdom of Your Mind with the Ancient Secrets of the Pendulum

You’ve received a stunning job offer. It has everything you want. Money, perks, the corner office with a window. Three secretaries. Only one problem, it is halfway across the country.

What do you do?

You have a job you truly enjoy that offers incredible personal satisfaction, and you know you are really making a difference, but you only earn minimum wage. You receive a letter in the mail saying you’ve been accepted in that MBA program you applied for only half seriously a few months ago. Do you give up your rewarding minimum wage job in the pursuit of financial success? Or do you stay in your low paying job, content in the knowledge that making a difference is what truly matters?

What do you do?

It’s Friday night. You’ve decided to order a pizza. You are not sure if you want pepperoni, or anchovies. You love them both. But if you eat them at the same time, they will mix and create a gastric disaster.

What do you do?

There are two ways to make a decision. Rational, logical, like Mr. Spock, or the other way. The old fashioned way. The way that the Samurai’s of ancient Japan referred to when they said that “every life changing decision must be made within seven breaths.” Trust your instinct. Your intuition. Your gut.

But how do you know? Unless your gut talks to you, (and if you think it does, maybe you should see a doctor,) how do you know exactly what your gut is telling you?

There are two ways to look at this. According to the laws of known science, and according to the esoteric laws of metaphysics.

According to the laws of metaphysics, your intuition can be thought of as a connection to ‘infinite knowledge, or infinite intelligence.” Many have spoken about this. Brian Tracy, Napoleon Hill, Wallace Wattles. According to these sages, who incidentally based their information on the sages that came generations before them, say that there is some ‘source’ of information that everyone can access. This ‘source’ has infinite knowledge of all that is, all that was, and all that will ever be. We might not have the capacity to understand all of this knowledge, but you can get general advice if you quiet your mind enough, so that you can listen carefully.

According to the rules, or understandings of science, biology and neurophysiology, the brain is an incredibly powerful computer. Able to take in literally billions of bits of information at time, sort and categorize, and then decide which to make consciously available, and which to store unconsciously, for later use. According to this model, when you ask yourself a life changing question, the brain sorts through all of your life experiences, compares them to the experience you are contemplating, and then comes up with an answer. Sounds wonderful and helpful, until you realize that this ‘answer’ usually comes in the form of a vague feeling. If we could only get our brains to make us feel hungry for yes, or thirsty for no, it might be easier.

One really cool way to tap your unconscious is to use a pendulum. Any pendulum will do, a chain with a weight on the end, like a necklace. Or a piece of string with a paper clip, anything that can swing back and forth.

What you need to do first is to calibrate it. Get a flat surface to swing your pendulum over, something that you can write on. A piece of paper on a table or desk will work fine. It’s important to keep the paper from moving, you’ll understand why in a second.

Hold the pendulum so that it hangs over the center of the paper. Now ask yourself a question where you know the answer will be yes. For example “Am I male (or female)?” Then just relax, and watch which way the pendulum swings. Ask another “yes” question. Watch the pendulum swing. Wherever the pendulum swings most over the paper for your ‘yes’ questions, is your yes ‘quadrant’ of your paper. After you have determined your ‘yes quadrant,’ make sure your don’t turn the paper. That will mess up your results. I usually tape it on the table or desk before I begin.

Next, you do the same thing, only this time use several ‘no’ questions. Questions you know that you’ll get a ‘no’ answer to. This will determine your ‘no quadrant.’

Now you need to ask your real question, phrased in a yes or no question. (Just like the magic eight ball.)  If you are getting fuzzy results, that is, if the answers are neither clearly yes or no, keep rephrasing the question. Pretty soon you should get a clear answer. You’ll be amazed at how well this works, and how well you can use this to unlock the wisdom of your own subconscious mind to help you get what you want out of life.

One thing to keep in mind, is that you will have to re-calibrate every time you do this. You’ll need to check and see where the ‘yes’ and ‘no’ quadrants are, because they will change based on your mood, tiredness, hunger, emotional state and other factors. It only takes a few minutes, and this can be a valuable tool that you can use in your quest to make decisions that support your goals in life.

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Christmas Camellia

This morning I saw this old guy that I usually pass by on my morning walk. “Ohayo Gozaimasu!” I said, as I usually do. (‘Ohayo gozaimasu’ is Japanese for ‘good morning.’) It seemed that he ignored me. I slowed down a bit, because he always responds in kind, and very cheerfully. He didn’t even seem to make any attempt at eye contact. I turned to look and see what he was looking at, and all I could see was a bunch of camellias over across the road.

Camellias are an interesting flower. They are nice to look at, and bloom when all the other flowers around them have decided to take the winter off. Maybe they think they got the short end of the stick, but I’m not so sure. Being a contrarian can have it’s advantages. Especially if you are a contrarian just because of chance.

For example, when you make a choice, some people base their decisions on internal factors, and others make their decisions on external factors. If you decide largely by internal factors, you will have your own reasons for doing that, without any regard to what other people will think. Like when you decide to get up a 5 AM and exercise every morning. You don’t do it because it’s popular, you do it because you’ve decided to do it for your own reasons. Other people make decisions based on external factors, or other people. Those people make decisions based on how other people think, or how they imagine other people will think. It’s almost like allowing a giant group of imaginary people make your own decision for you.

Like sometimes I’ll see a group of kids walking to school. They are supposed to walk in a straight line, with some designated kid the leader. Sometimes, though, I see a kid hanging out in the back, like you do sometimes when you decide to march to your own drummer, and kick a rock while you walk.

And sometimes when you decide to be a contrarian just for being a contrarians sake, you get extra benefits. That’s one of the reasons why the camellia leaf is used to make popular tea. One of the most popular ones is called Christmas Camellia.

And it turns out that old guy didn’t say hi because his wife had bought him a pair of earmuffs that affected his hearing a bit. Hear I was thinking he was marching to a different drummer, but that different drummer turned out to be his wife.

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